Writing a Great Online Dating Profile by @writeprofile4u

Feb 23, 2013 Comments by

A well-written, conversational and entertaining profile will bring you limitless opportunities to engage with other people in fun, stimulating and life-affirming ways.

But if it’s bland, boring or even slightly negative, no one’s going to pay it much attention. And why should they, when there are loads of other, more interesting profiles out there? Next!

People often ask me “How do I write a great online dating profile?” Ooh, I love that question! So I’m going to give you a few tips to get you started.

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These two little exercises will give you a head start, as well as valuable insight into how you’re coming across online:

1. Put yourself in your potential ideal partner’s shoes for a few minutes. Imagine him or her at the end of a long, hard day, trawling through online dating profiles. There are lots of them… what’s yours got that the others haven’t?

2. Imagine meeting an attractive person at a party. They immediately launch into a monologue about themselves and how great they are, reel off an uninspiring list of interests (“travel, socialising, films, eating out and music”) and suddenly announce they’re looking for commitment and don’t want any time-wasters. Then someone else comes over to you with a warm, confident smile, chats playfully and flirtatiously and asks questions which show they’re genuinely interested in you. Which would you choose? Bit of a no-brainer, eh?

When someone first reads your online profile, they’re hoping that not only will you make them smile, you’ll also give them that amazing feeling of connection and

recognition (“yes, I love that/do that too!”). So keep it upbeat, warm and outward-looking. At this stage, they don’t need to hear about your past relationships, trust issues, or lack of confidence. Don’t jeopardise your chances by giving too much personal info too soon.

Putting it bluntly, your online dating profile is your own sales pitch.

What’s most likely to turn us off in a sales pitch? The hard sell, that’s what: “This product’s fantastic, amazing, it can do this and that, give it a go, sign up, you won’t regret it, blah, blah blah”. Offputting, isn’t it? Not to mention a teeny bit desperate…

Don’t worry – you don’t need any of that counterproductive hard sell in your profile. Instead, focus on showing how great you are, rather than telling. For example, there’s no need to say “I’m a kind, thoughtful and compassionate person”. You are, of course, but you can convey that in a much more effective – and clever – way by saying you volunteer once a week at the local hospital because it gives you a warm glow inside.

If you’re struggling to find good things to say about yourself, ask a close friend how they’d describe you.

Remain true to yourself, while turning any negatives into positives. So if you’re an older man or woman who’s conscious about your age, you could say that you now love being at a stage in your life when you can get away with things that might make a younger person blush. Enjoy your journey of self-discovery.

Write in a friendly conversational style, as though you’re chatting to the person you want to attract. You won’t believe

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what a difference that makes. Read it out loud; listen to the way in which you’re presenting yourself. Ask someone you trust to give you feedback.

To attract great people into your life, your profile must reflect who you truly are and convey your unique, fantastic personality. Because there really is no one else quite like you. Stay confident and positive.

In summary, here’s how to write a great online dating profile:

  • Be warm, upbeat and playful. Don’t take yourself too seriously.
  • Write in a conversational style. No lists of likes and dislikes.
  • Ask questions. Give people something to respond to.
  • Yes, you’re selling yourself in your profile, but don’t tell people how great you are. Instead, weave in examples that show them.
  • Avoid clichés and boring, over-used words such as “socialising”, “attractive” or “sporty”.
  • Keep an open mind.
  • Be honest.

Good luck!

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About the author

WriteProfile4U was created by Mary de Vere Taylor, a veteran of the dating game who’s now in a long term relationship. Mary’s a published writer who values people, relationships and great communication. Her online dating profile writing service is highly sought after and her profiles have the power to change lives. Each profile (for clients aged between 18 and 85) is unique and showcases individual personalities in an unusual, engaging way. Confidentiality is guaranteed; distance no object.